As the holiday season gets ready to set in, Pennsylvania parents who must share their children’s time with a former spouse need to find ways to do this with grace for their own good as well as for their children’s benefit.

Apparently suggests that divorced parents should communicate together well in advance of the holidays to establish schedules and figure out where the kids will be on which days and for which events. This avoids putting kids in the middle by making them choose which parent to spend which day or holiday with. While it may seem like a good idea to give kids the choice, this actually just adds stress to their lives and leaves them feeling conflicted.

When it comes to giving gifts, Psychology Today advises moms and dads to collaborate on budgets so that neither gets into a competition to outdo the other. Talking about which gifts to purchase or not can also help avoid duplication and ensure that one parent does not purchase something the other parent would rather the child not have. The more parents can provide a united front even when divorced, the better for the kids. Failure to do this opens the door for kids to manipulate one parent unfairly.

Parents may also want to consider carefully which traditions should be carried on and what new traditions they might want to create. Having a mix of the old and the new can be a great way of helping children navigate a time of year known for sentimentality and excitement.